Some cricketers have all the luck.

They get extra chances, extra facilities, extra media attention, extra fan following and the utterly forgettable resultant - extra sponsorship deals.

You can bet that dour and gritty ex-India player and Railways all-rounder Sanjay Bangar never got to play those extraaa shots. He is your regular no-nonsense bits-and-pieces guy, born to do everyday jobs of far less national importance than making people flock to stadia just to watch him play.

Darrell Hair has been sacked by the ICC! He will not be allowed to officiate in international cricket matches henceforth! Either side of their premier showpiece event, the ICC has executed this final act on the controversial Australian umpire with the ruthlessness and eeriness of a war crime prosecution.

The original ICC ruling on the ball tampering controversy gave little indication of this grave eventuality. It only carried a mild rebuke for the umpiring community in general, urging them to take a pro-active role in times of strife rather than sit pretty and point to the rule book at every opportunity.

Openers:

• Virender “Why is Jaffer here? To breath down my neck?.. I can bowl.. Can he bowl?” Sehwag
• Sachin “I should do well in SA .. no McGrath there” Tendulkar
• Wasim “Why am I here? If I fail in the ODIs, would I be jeopardizing my test chances?” Jaffer

Middle Order:

• Rahul “what is happening to this team? Aren’t we sticking to the process enough?” Dravid
• Mohammad “For a change, I don’t feel guilty for keeping Laxman out.. that’s Raina’s job now” Kaif
• Suresh “why is Jaffer here? yeah Kaif is right.. I admit it.. I’m guilty for keeping Laxman out” Raina

Sunday’s game at Mohali between India and Australia is a virtual quarter-final. Here are some thoughts on what some of the cricketers in action would be hoping to do in that game.

Sachin Tendulkar needs 97 runs to complete 25,000 runs in international cricket. If he gets to do that in this game, India would be better placed to reach the semis. Also, his record against McGrath and Co. in recent times hasn’t been that great - scores of 5, 8, 27, 12 and 4 in his last 5 innings against the world’s best should hurt his pride. He would be real keen on setting the record straight on what is supposed to be an Aussie-friendly pitch.

Anyone else who thinks that six games, pitting Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, West Indies & Zimbabwe to find out who the best two are, is pretty pointless?

If the ICC had a cut-off of eight teams for the ICC Champions Trophy, why didn’t they just pick the first eight teams in the list and get the competition moving, rather than an extra stage?

At no point of time in the history of the ICC’s rankings have Bangladesh or Zimbabwe come anywhere close to the top 8.