Openers:

• Virender “Why is Jaffer here? To breath down my neck?.. I can bowl.. Can he bowl?” Sehwag
• Sachin “I should do well in SA .. no McGrath there” Tendulkar
• Wasim “Why am I here? If I fail in the ODIs, would I be jeopardizing my test chances?” Jaffer

Middle Order:

• Rahul “what is happening to this team? Aren’t we sticking to the process enough?” Dravid
• Mohammad “For a change, I don’t feel guilty for keeping Laxman out.. that’s Raina’s job now” Kaif
• Suresh “why is Jaffer here? yeah Kaif is right.. I admit it.. I’m guilty for keeping Laxman out” Raina
• Dinesh “Sorry Laxman, Feel for you, know exactly what you are going through” Mongia

Wicket-Keepers:

• Mahendra Singh “Kaarthick being in the squad doesn’t affect me” Dhoni
• Dinesh “Can both keepers play? I’m a better keeper, especially off Anil Bhai’s bowling” Kaarthick

Seamers:

• Irfan “hmm.. Zaheer is back.. I can bat at No.3.. Can he?” Pathan
• Zaheer “I can’t be as bad as Irfan.. my grandfather can’t be as bad as Irfan” Khan
• Shantakumaran “They should have never dropped me for the Champions Trophy “ Sreesanth
• Munaf “Zaheer or no Zaheer.. I’m the No.1 seamer in the country” Patel
• Ajit “Damn it Morton.. What did my finger do to you?” Agarkar

Spinners:

• Harbhajan “Anil Bhai, you do realize that I’m the No.1 spinner now, Don’t ya?” Singh
• Anil “Finally, someone sensible is heading the selectors” Kumble

Standby:

• VRV “Hope Ajit’s finger is as brittle as the Indian middle order.. no the WI middle order” Singh

Missing Names:

• VVS “Fitness? What do you want me to do? Run a marathon” Laxman
• Ramesh “Anil Bhai, you can’t do this to me” Powar
• Rudra Pratap “If they hadn’t picked me for the Champions Trophy, I would have made it to SA” Singh